It Must Be A Defect

You preach not to be numb, but that's how you thrive. You pretend to create and observe, when you really detach from feeling alive.

Monday, July 31, 2006

Stand Still, Look Pretty

I want to paint my face
And pretend that I am someone else
Sometimes I get so fed up I don't even want to look at myself
But people have problems that are worse than mine
I don't want you to think I'm complaining all the time
And I hate the way you look at me I have to say
I wish I could start over again
I am slowly falling apart
I wish you'd take a walk in my shoes for a start
You might think it's easy being me
You just stand still, look pretty
Sometimes I find myself shaking in the middle of the night
And then it hits me and I can't even believe this is my life
But people have problems that are worse than mine
I don't want you to think I'm complaining all the time
And I wish that everyone would go and shut theit mouths
I'm not strong wnough to deal with it

"Stand Still, Look Pretty" The Wreckers

Monday, July 03, 2006

When it rains could you call me please, and make my day?

How could you just forget about me?
How could you cut me out of your life like that?
You said that you would always be there for me
That I was important to you
That you cared about me
And I opened up to you
I told you things I told no one else
I trusted you, even when I hate trusting people
And you left me
You left me alone when I needed someone
You just deserted me
Decided that I wasn't important to your life anymore
Without a second thought you left me
And you aren't the first person to do this to me
I suppose you won't be the last

I wanna listen to the lullabye of Broadway

You know you shouldn't want to do it...but you do.
You feel guilty for wanting it
You feel bad at feeling guilty
You get angry at feeling bad
You're conflicted.
You know what you should do
You know what you shouldn't do
Yet some how in your head...it gets all confused and tangled
You have no way of explaining it
You have no way of verbalizing
You know no one else in the world feels like you do
They haven't gone through what you have
You are different
You are the first one to experience these feelings and conflicting emotions.

You're not.
Other people have problems
Some are worse than yours
Others aren't
Don't discount everyone else's problems
Get over yourself

Sunday, July 02, 2006

How can I make you see that I'm not always wrong?

When I'm with you I feel like all my problems fade away
You know what to day to make me smile
You know what to do to make me laugh
You know how to hold me to make me feel safe
In your arms I feel like I will never fall again
I feel stable and safe, like nothing could go wrong
I try and keep my problems to myself
But you know whenever I upset
Sometimes I don't even need to say a word...
And you just know by looking at me
You can see past my smile and see the pain that is so overwhelming inside
How do you do it?
You're my safe place to hide
The one who I run to, even when I am unaware I'm running
I try and push you away but you don't leave
I tell you I hate you...that I don't need you...that I don't need anyone
I lie.
I love you..I need you...I need you more than anyone else
And that scares me.
It scares me how safe I feel in your arms...
That with your arms around me and you pressed close to me I calm down immediately
Your scent makes me high
Your touch makes me fly
Your voice soothes my soul
Your smile brightens my day
Your laugh makes me soar
Your love makes me whole.