Can you help me, I'm bent. I'm so scared that I'll never be put back together

Does anyone read this? Has anyone stumbled across it? Probably not. If they did they would think "wow, this chick is seriously depressed." And I am. I need to be on medications (from my own diagnosis) but I'm not. And I'm not going to be.

I'm unhappy.

Isn't it funny that it is so easy to write that down...especially here, where no one I know will find it.

I am unhappy with my life. Every aspect of my life. I didn't think you were supposed to feel this way as you got older...I still do.

Nothing is going the way I want it to go. Not things with family. Not with friends. Not with work. not with school. Not with anything.

I need to feel needed. I need to be needed. And wanted. And I'm not. I have this feeling like I am just there and everyone would either be fine or better off without me here.

I don't like feeling like this. I don't like looking into the mirror and feeling numb. I don't like be startled to find tears rolling down my cheeks. I don't like having to wipe those tears away just in time to paste on a smile when someone walks into a room.

I hate the fact that I'm sad. I hate the fact that I feel like I can't tell anyone because no one will understand.

I hate that I am crazy.